This is what I had been working towards!
This was a game between two teams who are expected to feature strongly in their respective leagues at the new season's Contributory level. CE asked me if I fancied having a go at running his line and personally I thought he was taking a risk on me, but I agreed, eager to try out my new found fitness. We had trained hard during the summer and while at times I had found it very, very hard, I was beginning to feel the benefits but also the costs.
The major benefit has been me slimming down a lot as body fat has burned off to be replaced by muscle. My legs are as big as when I played rugby league over 20 years ago, when I was on the verge of turning professional before an eye injury prematurely ended my career. My clothes no longer look like they are painted on and my wife, well she has told me that I look rather good.
The cost has been mainly mental. I make no bones about the fact that I will be 45 years of age next Friday. I have abused my body over the years, firstly as a rugby player being battered twice a weekend for 4 years, then doing nothing for 15 years until a divorce forced me to tackle my approaching middle age. From there I trained hard, up to 5 times a week, turning my previously flabby mush into a well toned frame that went down rather well with the ladies and led directly to me attracting my wife (it was the legs).
Once our son was born 3 1/2 years ago I slid back to my slovenly ways before starting to train last June (half heartedly). I therefore start every training session with some trepidation about suffering an injury. I have often said to Fat Lad and CE, that if I incur a serious injury, then I don't know if I could fight my way back to fitness to pick up a whistle again.
There has also been certain personal challenges along the way, for example managing the whole lap around the field without stopping for a rest, daring to stride out a full pace without fear of my hamstring over stretching and then there was taking on the potential for embarrassment presented by last night's game.
One of the worst moments of my time on the green stuff was a game I was due to assist on in early May last season. I had completed the warm-up with the referee and as I turned away to check that the nets had been secured properly, my hamstring tweaked and I had to tell the referee that I couldn't do the game. Last night, the referee was our 4th official and the other assistant on the same game was supposed to be on the opposite touchline from me. I'm sure it was no accident that we had all been drawn together by CE ... but I had a secret weapon ... I had a 1kg tub of Jelly beans which were going to help me keep my energy levels up!
What happens on tour, stays on tour so little of the game action will be mentioned except for two kicks from the penalty mark being awarded by CE (both at the opposite end of the field from me and both saved by the goalkeepers), a very crude challenge, a fantastic solo goal and a glaring error by me!
The error happened when the ball flashed past me and I was convinced it as going too fast for it to remain in play. I hadn't seen who touched it last so I looked at CE who was around 15m away with "HELP" written all over my face. He was looking at me with a "Give me a decision" look on his face. I therefore banged the flag up for a defensive throw-in. To my horror, when I looked down and to my right the ball was sitting in the arc around the corner of the field ... it hadn't gone out of play!!! All the players had stopped, CE shouted for them to play on and suddenly the game burst back into life.
The home left back ribbed me about the flag at the next throw-in and again during the game and in the clubhouse, but it was all in good fun. As for CE and me, we just laughed long and hard. All through the game, Chuckle the Younger, Fat Lad, Mrs CE and Mrs Fat Lad had been taking the mickey out of me, but only when I wasn't busy. It was good to hear some friendly voices, especially when I nearly choked on my handful of Jelly Beans as I sprinted one way, then the other to keep up with play.
As for the rest, well apart from the first 8m36s when I was blowing out of my arse and the last 6m53s when I was out on my feet, I coped with the pace reasonably well and CE said I didn't look out of place. He said the next stage is to get me fit enough to take the middle in games like that one, never mind the line. If only I was 20 years younger. I burned 1538 calories, with a 93% max and a 75% average ... and more fun than training!
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